Lila will be a month old on saturday! are you kidding? where did this month go? it’s crazy. and as i look back at the past 9 months, it seems even more strange to have an actual baby who is like all other babies. she’s sweet, she’s alert, she sleeps all the time, she cries a lot now that she’s starting to wake up, etc. she’s a real baby! a real baby is such an abstract idea when you are pregnant. and especially when you are altering your life so significantly for this little one while still pregnant. you wonder a little bit if it’s all worth it. i knew it was because i’d do the bedrest any day for gabe and mia and knew i’d some day feel the same about lila. and indeed it is. this girl is so sweet! i’m totally into her.
this was the craziest pregnancy! first off to do all the progesterone and have a little bit of spotting. STRESS! then at 20 weeks, to find the previa = no exercize for the past 5 months! then to have the bed rest for the last 7 weeks, 6 at home, one in the hospital. meanwhile, finding out i was anemic. then an amnio (NOT fun) and a c-section at 36 weeks, 6 days. recovering from a c-section is not fun at all. i don’t get why people would schedule them on purpose! it’s SO much worse recovery-wise. BUT in all of it, we had a perfect baby girl! she came out rocking the long black mo-hawk hair, good size and lungs and nursed right away. i was so thankful. SO thankful. there’s no way it would have happened that way if the whole world hadn’t pitched in to make it work. my mom being here the whole time was indispensable, jeff was so awesome every minute with the kids. friends brought all kinds of food, movies, books, took care of the kids, everything. this baby’s lack of developmental problems is a direct result of the awesome community of people we have around us. it’s why we made it to 37 weeks. i am so thankful.
gabe and mia love their baby sister. mia is ridiculously helpful, calling her her little pumpkin all the time. gabe just wants to look at her and give her kisses. it’s so cute. they really are great kids. right now the poor baby is screaming her brains out because she’s so tired and can’t figure out how to fall asleep and they are both dying to make her feel better. sweet big brother and sister : ).
as for me, i’m recovering. actually yesterday i felt so good. i was up for cleaning house, grocery shopping AND going to the park, and i wasn’t rude to gabe and mia once! granted i was worked by the end of the day, but it still felt good. 3 weeks really is a significant benchmark. it always is, i just forgot.

okay, poor baby is still so sad in there.  i doubt i’ll ever get a whole post done at once again!  i love this level of chaos though.  i think it fits me. : )